The good news is, Blue Eyes is at a new daycare/preschool. She is very happy there and loves her teachers and the other kids. That is a brief ray of sunshine when I look at my last post.
I just recieved news that yet another friend has had a "something" removed from her breast. First it was a friend from college that I hadn't seen in 8 years. She's the one who helped me get where I am today, quite literally. Full double mastectomy, chemo, the whole bit. (This started in Feb.) Next, I find out a neighbor -- a woman who I come home and chat with two or three times a week -- a woman who has shown me what it's like to be a calm and patient grandmother, an excellent... okay, down right f'ing awesome housekeeper and matriarch -- found she had cancer. One breast gone, lymph nodes, gone. Chemo still to come.
And then I find yet another friend -- a "sister" who is younger than me -- she's f---ing younger than me just went in to have a lump removed. Didn't show up on a scan, couldn't biopsy it, so they removed a lump. And this is just what had happened to my neighbor 6 years ago.
And I know I shouldn't make this all about me. It's not all about me. But how did I go from being someone who had known NO ONE with this disease to knowing three friends, three incredible women having something like this just jump on them? I don't know what to do. I feel so incredibly helpless. And I can pray about it, because if anyone has any control over anything, it would be God. But sometimes I wish he had e-mail and would respond plainly, because sometimes I just want to ask him, WHAT THE FUCK?
Sending out a prayer and a laugh and some hope to all women dealing with fear out there.
'Cause after all of it, the fear is the worst. (At least, that's from my limited perspective.)